Reply To: Carla Ward submissions

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Zara West

Hi Carla,

You are perfectly correct that there is a continuum of POVs, and a good author uses them all. However certain genres lean more to one end or the other. You are writing a light-hearted romance with fabulous characters that has what authors strive for –“voice.” This type of romance calls for a deeper POV to maintain consistency in that voice.

A middle POV would be something like Nicolas Sparks in this excerpt.

Tru spoke enough of the man’s language to keep a conversation going; in all, he was relatively fluent in six languages, two of them tribal. The other four were English, French, German, and Spanish. It was one of the qualities that made him an employee sought after by lodges. He eventually dropped the man off and continued his drive, finally reaching a road paved in asphalt. He stopped for lunch soon after, simply pulling off the road to eat in the bed of his truck in the shade of an acacia tree. The sun was high by then and the world around him was quiet, no animals in sight.

Sparks, Nicholas. Every Breath (pp. 22-23). Grand Central Publishing. Kindle Edition.

A light-hearted romance like yours is more like this one by Marie Force (she would make a good comp for you, by the way). Note the strong verbs and actions.

Mac waved to the driver. He cleared the cargo area and fixed his gaze on the Beachcomber, the iconic building that anchored the town. The quacking horn of a Range Rover painted yellow and tricked out like a duck—complete with a bill affixed to the hood—caught Mac’s eye. Laughing at the JSTDKY license plate, he stepped off the curb onto Main Street. A searing pain stabbed through his left leg, sending him sprawling into the street.

Maid for Love (Gansett Island Series Book 1) (p. 5). HTJB, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

Both of these examples by best-selling authors are beautifully written and convey meaning and image to the reader. Both authors use a range of POV in these books, but Marie leans toward deeper, and Nicolas leans toward more distant so they feel different. It is your decision as to the voice you want to convey, but do think about consistency and who will be reading your novel and what their expectations are based on similar books to yours that they have read.

Hope that helps explain why I was making all those suggestions. My goal was the maintain the same light-hearted, genre correct voice so beautifully expressed in Chapter 1 throughout the work.  I hope you will do the same for me. Zara




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