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#42712
Cynthia Capley
Participant

I love the title!

1. Inciting Incident – I feel the inciting incident is Daisy turning down the lead in the pharmaceutical case and deciding to go help her mom.

2. Trigger Set Up – Daisy’s mom breaking her wrist and needing help with flower arrangements.

3. Can you spot fire or first flickering of possible fire MC won’t be able to put out? ┬áHer leaving to help her mom will lead to something happening between her and Edward. We’re getting hints that this decision will impact this relationship in some way.

4. Is there clear change happening? Daisy’s decision to leave will lead to changes she doesn’t expect. She is regretting her career choice and is looking for something different to do.

5. Suggestions for first pages, if any? Is it brain craving worthy?

I had questions that came up as I was reading. Does Daisy have an expertise in flower arranging? How does she feel about flower arranging? Was it something she did as a child?

We know she is going to Houndsville to help her mother but I would’ve liked getting more on how she feels about going back home. Is there anything she is nervous about or looking forward to? If it’s a small town does she already know Betsy? Does Daisy have any thoughts about Betsy?

It seems that there are rumors about Daisy and Edward. Is the fact that they’re together an open secret? How does Daisy feel about this? Are Edward and Daisy peers? Is this a relationship her father would approve of? Has she disappointed her father in turning down the lead position? How does she feel about that?

This are brain craving parts: Is she going to adopt Soldier? Are Daisy and Edward a couple? What will happen to their relationship when they go to Houndsville?

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