Reply To: Student: Rebecca Rector Homework Thread

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#43000
Linnea Sinclair
Moderator

But Linnea, shouldn’t I add details about noises and smells and how his bare feet feel against the rough sidewalk? Or am I overthinking it? Hmm, maybe I already know the answer–add them if they mean something to the character or plot? Add the noise if it changes so he can overhear the uniforms, add the smell from the donut shop if that’s what makes his stomach rumble, add how his feet feel if someone steps on them and that’s why he makes a noise that attracts the notice of the uniforms? Yes? Maybe?

You have this: The boom of a booster K4 lifting off from the spaceport shook the whole street. Door armor fused protectively over the shops until pebbles and debris stopped pinging against the buildings.

Which I very much like. But, yes, once you get the opening chapter done, you can go back in and fluff in those small details. I don’t know how much in MG that’s called for. I know in adult fiction, yes. Daylight or night? Rain or summer heat? We don’t need oodles, we need slight mentions worked in naturally. The pebbles under his feet, the aroma of food… yes. But don’t dump it all in the first 100 words. It has to fit.

//Interstellar Adventure Infused with Romance//
www.linneasinclair.com

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