Reply To: 9- Emotional change and parallel scenes

Home Forums WRITING EMOTIONS WITHOUT PURPLE PROSE 9- Emotional change and parallel scenes Reply To: 9- Emotional change and parallel scenes


Sorry for my late response – I’m catching up…again. 🙂

So, I had two scenes I was editing last week that I think kind of showed this, if I understand this right.

In one scene, my female main character was upset and snapped at the male main character on a date because he had suggested that the little ghost boy who visits her and depends on her needs closure and offered to help her track down living family members of the boy. However, for her, that would mean she would lose him-she sees him as her own child now-and is very protective over him. That’s why she had overreacted and stomped off. The scene continues with her dealing with what just had happened and ended with calling the male character.

The next scene was in his point of view and picked up parallel in time when she had walked away from him and him trying to figure out what had gone wrong. He just wanted to help her and the boy. He realized that he didn’t want to lose her over this and there had to be a way that he could be with her, despite her focus on the little ghost boy.

So, back to parallel scenes, they picked up (time wise) again when she called him to apologize after doing some serious introspection and admitting she needed help, but they shouldn’t date because the boy is taking up all her time and she couldn’t handle a relationship on top of that. It’s too overwhelming for her. However, he tells her that she didn’t have to go through this all by herself and that he wants to be by her side and support her, especially when the time would come to say goodbye to the kiddo. So in that scene, she realizes that both, her date and the little boy, are not mutually exclusive and she could have both, because the only other living being she was close to in life was her hamster Pepe, and he couldn’t hold her in his arms and console her 🙂

Basically, those scenes are all dealing with her having to choose between the boy and her date, an either/or decision in her mind. However, in the later scene, the male character makes her see that she doesn’t have to pick a side. She can have both, if she’d only accept his help.

Just writing this out to make what I learned stick to my brain…lol


Author of Sweet Small-Town Romances as Lexie Nicholas
Author of Sweet Lighthearted Ghost Romances as Nickie Cochran


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