Great work!! Strong set up here. I’m so happy to hear this made you think of your characters in a slightly different way.
A few questions, because I think answering them will lead to a deeper connection to the psyche of your characters.
You wrote: “Maleko Hale needs to keep his family’s Kona coffee farm afloat because his father entrusted him to carry out the family legacy, but his inability to trust others and his own decision making gets in his way.”
So what happened that makes him unable to trust?
HOW does this get in his way? Specifically, how does it manifest?
If HE is being relied upon to carry out the family legacy, why can’t he provide that same sort of confidence in return? There is faith in him, so why does he lack faith in others? Does he lack faith in himself?
As for Becca, I feel like there is something related to her flaw and motive that pushes this goal to the forefront of her mind. She went ten years without having her daughter meet her dad, so what happened that made her realize it was time? It may seem like a small thing, or unrelated, but that trigger is likely hugely related to her flaw.
Maleko Hale – Main Character
Goal—To keep his family’s Kona coffee farm afloat and successful
Motive—To carry out the family legacy his father entrusted him with
Flaw—Inability to trust anyone, including himself, in part due to having the love of his life exit without a word and return ten years later with his daughter
Stakes—Losing coffee farm and losing chance to have his family
Maleko Hale needs to keep his family’s Kona coffee farm afloat because his father entrusted him to carry out the family legacy, but his inability to trust others and his own decision making gets in his way. After ten years, the love of his life, Becca Stowers, returns to the island with his nine year old daughter in tow. If Maleko cannot overcome his inability to trust, he may not only risk losing his family’s coffee farm, but he may also lose the family he’s always dreamed of and the chance to raise his children there.
Becca Stowers – Main Character #2
Goal—To return to the life she misses on the Big Island
Motive—To give her daughter a relationship with the father she’s never met
Flaw—Guilt of leaving Maleko and never telling him of Malorie’s existence, as well as, devotion to her father who forced her to leave Hawaii
Stakes—Lose the love of her life and her daughter
Becca Stowers wants to return to her life on the Big Island after ten years because she wants her daughter, Mallorie, to have a relationship with the father she’s never met, but Becca’s guilt and devotion to her own father gets in her way. If she cannot over the guilt and devotion, she may not only her second chance at love but also her daughter.
Though I always outline my characters in detail with history/personality/goal, doing this in this format really made me think hard about these two characters.
Katie McCoach, Instructor
Grow your best story!