Reply To: CHAIN EVENT in September ⛓

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#49470
Kathy Crouch
Participant

Hi Y’all,

I’ve been here in Starbucks listening to Sirius XM online. I’ve written 1115 words. Before I started adding words I was reading back through the beginning parts of the story. I’ve got 2-3 pages of writing that’s out of sync with the timeline. I haven’t decided whether to move all of it, delete it, keep it and move it or what. I will decide when I finish it. I did find one sentence that I had left a word out of that made no sense and tripped me up. The funny thing is it’s dialogue.

“You can ___ those big blue eyes wide open. I thought I’d give her a few minutes longer. Maybe take her inside give her a bath see if that works.”

It should read:

“You can see those big blue eyes wide open. I thought I’d give her a few minutes longer. Maybe take her inside give her a bath see if that works.”

The heroine is talking to her dad.

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