Reply To: Week 40 Check-in

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#49887
CPRider
Moderator

Hi Kathy:

When I used ProWritingAid, I considered it a guide. It’s going to flag passive sentences, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to change them. Passive sentences are useful, too. I would pay attention to how many I had and see if there were places to fine-tune my prose to be more active. But only if it makes sense. In your case, the first sentence feels better to you, so of course, you should use it the way you see best.

Sounds like you got some good editing time in this week. Nice!

Cheryl

 

Hi Cheryl and everyone,

This past week I’ve started using Pro Writing Aid to help with revising the conglomeration of words I wrote the past 3 months. It’s plainer and easier to understand for me than Auto Crit.

Other than arguing with it over this bit.

Explaining what was happening, the doctor said, “I’m going to have the nurse check on the progress of getting you in a room. I’ll be back to review your signs in a few minutes.”

After the doctor left, Julie lay there trying to fit the pieces together. Her life, their life, twisted and torn apart like a tornado hitting a house.

“I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t ease the pain. But he was gone before you could get him.”

Opening her eyes, she studied the man standing at the foot of her bed.

Probably six foot two or three with dark blue-green eyes combined with dark brown hair. He seemed to appear from nowhere. Who was he?

“I heard what you said.”

To change it from the passive flag I wrote He died before you reached him.

To me that somehow seems harsh and cruel. The heroine’s husband was just shot and killed when he walked in on an armed robbery in progress when he stopped for gas.

This week I also worked on writing a synopsis of this working title The Missing Children and wrote 1135 words.

Editing I spent 27 hours working on it.

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