Reply To: Exercise 8

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 Reply To: Exercise 8


This is definitely clearer, Joanna.

Johnny’s quote still sounds a little odd to  my ears. Maybe something like. “Huh. I guess I got stuck living through the silver age.”

The exact wording would indicate his mood, which I guessed to be bemused. Angry would be different.

My instincts say there is a better hook to be found. And Johnny’s comment feels a bit strained. but this does the job, and I believe someone will buy the story with this beginning.



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