Zara West

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Viewing 30 posts - 271 through 300 (of 318 total)
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  • in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28578
    Zara West
    Participant

    Thanks Jenn,  Great feedback and suggestions.  Glad you are enjoying the story.  One chapter to go.  Zara

    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28577
    Zara West
    Participant

    Thank you so much for the great catches, Ana.

     

    Zara

    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28554
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is Chapter 3 from my Carpenter Christmas story. All feedback welcome.

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    in reply to: Jenn Fox Submissions #28552
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is my feedback, Jen. Lots to like in these two chapters.

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Connie Bretes Submissions #28525
    Zara West
    Participant

    here arte thoughts, Connie. Use what is helpful. Zara

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    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28524
    Zara West
    Participant

    Hi Connie,

     

    Thank you for those catches. Much appreciated. Zara

    in reply to: Ana Morgan submissions #28502
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here are my thoughts. Use what is helpful as always.

     

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    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28488
    Zara West
    Participant

    Thank you so much, Jenn. Very helpful feedback.

    Zara

    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28485
    Zara West
    Participant

    Thanks, Ana. Your feedback is always so helpful. Much appreciated.  Zara

    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28479
    Zara West
    Participant

    I am trying to write a sweet Christmas short story. Here is the beginning. Any thoughts? Comments? All feedback welcome.

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    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28426
    Zara West
    Participant

    Thank you Jenn for all the great suggestions for this and the previous chapters. I am busying making all those changes. Working on edits from my publishers so all catches at this point are powerfully helpful.

    Zara

    in reply to: Jenn Fox Submissions #28424
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is my feedback. Use what is helpful. Zara

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    in reply to: Ana Morgan submissions #28394
    Zara West
    Participant

    here is my feedback. Use what is helpful. Also thank you for your crit of my Chapter 30.

    Zara

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28361
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is chapter 30. All feedback appreciated. Zara

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Connie Bretes Submissions #28357
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is some feedback. Zara

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #28206
    Zara West
    Participant

    Hi Zara, here’s my crit of chapter 29.

    Connie

    Thanks for all the great catches. Made those changes. Zara

    in reply to: Connie Bretes Submissions #28154
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is my take on Chapter 9. As far as I know the speech was pretty much the same as now in the late 1880s so consider maybe having her wearing an old-fashion hairstyle instead. Also consider writing this in past tense. I am not sure present works for your story. See my comment at the end.

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #27880
    Zara West
    Participant

    I definitely moved that paragraph in Chapter 28. Thanks for the feedback. Here is chapter 29. The story continues.

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Join the Racing Hearts NANO Team #27874
    Zara West
    Participant
    Hi all, My name is Zara West. My NaNoWriMo handle is Zara West Suspense.
    My email I am using is zarawestbooks@gmail.com.
    Super writing, everyone! Zara
    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #27777
    Zara West
    Participant

    I’m excited for the ending!

    Jenn

    Thanks so much, Jenn. Great catches. I love the idea at the end of showing the kittens at his house earlier. Have a good idea about where to insert that. Zara

    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #27763
    Zara West
    Participant

    Perfect timing, Zara. I’d just sat down at work to work on my next chapter. And your sub popped in.

    Hooray for Mic!

    ana

    Great catches, Ana. Thanks so much. We are getting to the end now.

    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #27762
    Zara West
    Participant

    Hi Zara, I feel like I might have missed a chapter…. Anyway, here’s some suggestions.

    Thanks for the feedback, Connie. This is the chapter following the one you read last. Do you think that is unclear or did you figure out by the third paragraph she’d come back to Jax for her family and gotten captured? I think I might need to move that paragraph up. Zara

    in reply to: Connie Bretes Submissions #27747
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here’s some corrections for CH 8

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    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #27743
    Zara West
    Participant

    Here is Chapter 28 of Under the Skin. All comments deeply appreciated.  Zara

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    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #5099
    Zara West
    Participant

    Loved it!

    Jenn

    Thank you, Jenn. I made all those changes. Zara

    in reply to: Welcome new member Denise Young! #5098
    Zara West
    Participant

    Please join me in welcoming a new member to our group.

    Denise Young!

    Denise, we’re happy you joined. When you feel comfortable, tell us what genre(s) you write and where you are on your publishing adventure.

    Ana

    Welcome Denise. This is a great critique group. Zara

    in reply to: Connie Bretes Submissions #5096
    Zara West
    Participant

    Good Morning,

    Chapter 6 and 7 for review.

    Warm Regards,

    Connie c/o Merien ?

    here are some comments. Use what helps. Zara

     

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Ana Morgan submissions #5091
    Zara West
    Participant

    [

    New Sub by Ana.

    Chapter 19

    Robert settles into life on the Far West freighter.

    TIA for your comments and suggestions!

    Ana

    here is my feedback. Use what is helpful. Zara

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Ana Morgan submissions #5089
    Zara West
    Participant

    New Sub by Ana.

    Chapter 19

    Robert settles into life on the Far West freighter.

    TIA for your comments and suggestions!

    Ana

    Here are some comments, Anna. Still having trouble with that Enjun nickname. use what is helpful.

    Zara

    Attachments:
    in reply to: Zara West Submissions #5062
    Zara West
    Participant

    Ooh, going to see Jax. I want to read the next chapter!

    Ana

    Thanks so much, Ana. made all those changes. Zara

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